Saturday, 8 March 2014

How to get rid of writer's block

Writer's block. Sigh. Once it comes it's hard to get rid of, but here I have compiled a list of ways to put an end to it. I've put an example that I wrote underneath each one. And yes, this list is as much intended for me as it is for you. Enjoy.

  • 1: Write a letter to writer's block about why you're breaking up with him/her.

Dear Writer's Block, 

It's not you, it's me. Actually, it is you. I can't handle it anymore. I want to go out and see my friends Journal and Pen but you never let me. Whenever I go to see Writing you frantically call and text me, asking where I am, just as I get to the interesting parts of the conversation. 

I need a bit of personal time to spend doing whatever I wish. We should spend some time apart. It's been a long time since I spent some quality time with Writing, Journal and Pen. We used to be so close - we were best mates, but now we've drifted apart. This may sound harsh, but you're the reason that our group has disintegrated. 

When you first came into my life, I was quite relieved. I spent time outdoors in the fresh air, exercising and getting rid of the awful headache and back-ache I had. I quite enjoyed that day. I thought to myself: "What's one day without Writing?". Soon enough, one day turned into two days, which turned into a week, a month, two months. I became bored - with you, with myself, with everything I laid my eyes on. I spent my time on Tumblr and Polyvore, refreshing the page every five minutes. I had nothing to do, nothing that would help me relax. 

I crave the excitement that Writing brings to me - I NEED the excitement Writing brings me. We're breaking up. 

Wishing you all the best in for the future,

  • 2: Write a letter to your past/future self (for the sake of this example, I'm writing to myself 10 years in the future - but what you write to is up to you).
Dear Future Me, 

How's life? Life is pretty simple here, back when you were 13. Good job on surviving high school - middle school's pretty tough by itself. Have you gotten into university? If not, don't worry, keep trying. Don't ever give up. It might seem like the road ahead is rough and rocky, but it gets better and soon enough you'll be on a nice pavement or a nice clean road. 

Is Sherlock still a legitimate show that's still on air? Is Benedict Cumberbatch still a relevant person? Have you been to the US yet (if you got into a university in the US, congratulations). Is Apple still a leading technological innovator, or is it a thing of the past? 

I'm hoping you don't procrastinate as much as I do. If you're a terrible procrastinator, don't be too harsh on yourself. Set goals - before you do anything, sit down and make a list of the things you must get finished, then start finishing things! Here's a toast to you getting rid of your procrastination habits (if you already have, here's a toast to you being amazing). 

Do you still write on your (my) blog? What do you write about? Do you get writers block? If you're a famous writer or a famous writer in the making or even just a stay-at-home blogger - I hope you haven't forgotten where you began... 

Future me, I hope you take care of yourself. We've beaten ourselves up a number of times. We have fallen face first, drowned in our problems, cried at night. Somewhere between you and me, I can tell that we've figured stuff out - how to be happy, how to stand up after falling, how to get over our problems. Good job. 

Love from your younger, 13-year-old, sarcastic, geeky, hopeful, not-sporty-at-all self, 
(P.S. What karate belt are you on? Can you run a mile without feeling like the living dead?)

  • 3: Make your writing pretty.
Plain old black/blue and white can get boring, so write in different coloured pens. If you write on the computer, use different fonts. Lastly, if you have nothing to write - look for quotes that you like and copy them down in different fonts or lettering. 
  • 4: Do something else.
Doing something else is one of the easiest ways to get your mind off the problems you face while writing. I keep a book that I stick pretty pictures in, and sometimes I work on my lookbook. It doesn't really matter what you're in to, just do something other than writing. The only problem with this tip is that sometimes you forget about the writing. 
  • 5: Write anything. Even if it's absolute rubbish.
The heart is like a plastic bag. It can be stepped on, trodden on, bulldozed over, and it will still be okay for the moment. But mistreat it too often and it will show signs of wear and tear - rips will form, the material will get thinner and holes will emerge... until one day it gets to be too much and the plastic bag breaks. 

Kindred hearts and souls that care are like trees. Increasingly rare to come by, and a refreshing break from the concrete jungle that is our everyday lives. 

Friends are like coins. There are two sides to them - good and bad. When they're bad, they're the worst enemies you'll ever meet. They know all your secrets and are most likely not afraid to sell them for more secrets in return. They'll gossip behind your back and pull out honey-coated knives as soon as you turn away. But when they're good, they're great - like second a second sister or brother. You can pour out your soul to them and they'll nod sympathetically. Stain their shirt with your tears? They won't so much as bat an eyelash, let alone ask you to pay their dry-cleaning bill. 

There are many strange contradictions and interesting similes or metaphors to explore in our world. 
  • 6: Make up an imaginary friend, and hold a conversation with them. 
This sounds absolutely ridiculous, but it works. Make up a name for your imaginary friend - call them Bob if you're feeling uninspired. Write a letter to them. By the way, your imaginary friend is a true fan and they love anything you write, so no worries about him/her criticizing every word you write.

  • 7: Rant. Write swear words if it helps.
I. HATE. BUGS. They're everywhere and I get so many bites and even though I practically take showers in bug repellent they still manage to track me down and suck out my soul via my veins. alkfjdaoifuadslafmsdfdsufaodi *bashes head on keyboard*

So there it is. Seven methods for beating writers block, complete with five examples. Please, somebody nominate me for a prestigious award or something. 

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